The three-month salary rule is often mentioned when engagement rings come into the picture. It suggests that someone should spend the equivalent of three months of their gross income to buy one. This idea did not begin as a tradition. It came from a marketing campaign started by De Beers in the 1930s. At first, the push was for one month’s salary, but by the 1980s, the company had increased that to three. The purpose was clear: increase people’s spending on diamonds during slow economic periods.
That rule stayed in the culture, but spending patterns have changed. Data from The Knot in 2023 shows the average cost of an engagement ring in the U.S. is around $5,500. Ten percent spent less than $1,000. In Canada, ring spending averaged $3,500. Australian earners with monthly incomes close to AUD $5,000 would have to spend three times that to meet the “rule,” but most ring purchases there do not get close to that level. Using U.S. Census Bureau figures, a median annual income of around $60,000 would mean spending $15,000 under the rule. Yet most people do not go beyond one-third of that amount.
Recent consumer studies confirm this. A UK survey showed that 68 percent of respondents found the three-month rule too expensive. Another showed that 79 percent of engaged couples spent less than three months’ worth of their earnings. In the U.S., 72 percent of millennials said they preferred to stay within their financial limits rather than follow a set rule.
Many now prefer lab-grown diamonds or rings with alternative features. Lab diamonds can cost 30 to 50 percent less and still look almost identical to mined stones. About 18 percent of ring purchases now fall into this lower-cost category. Among younger buyers under 35, 64 percent seek rings that are ethically sourced. That often includes lab-grown stones or simpler designs.
How Ring Shapes Influence Budget Decisions
Different diamond cuts can influence how people interpret value and cost, often swaying budget decisions. Round brilliant cuts remain the most common and tend to be priced higher due to higher rough diamond waste during cutting. On the other end, shapes like marquise, oval, and Asscher provide a larger face-up appearance per carat, which appeals to cost-conscious buyers seeking visual emphasis without exceeding budget.
Among rectangular shapes, a popular choice is the emerald cut diamond ring, known for its clean lines and large table. In comparison, cushion and princess cuts also offer geometric appeal, but subtle differences in brilliance and style can affect pricing.
Social media has also affected buyer behavior. On platforms like TikTok, users share ring-budget tips and promote less expensive stones such as moissanite. Many viewers respond by showing interest in rings well below the traditional cost. Some videos under popular hashtags include side-by-side comparisons of lower-cost rings with high-end ones that are visibly alike in shape and sparkle.
Psychological factors also play a role. One study in 2019 found that women shown examples of higher dating prospects chose rings 1.2 carats larger than those in lower-mate scenarios. In that experiment, size became a display of value. Other findings show that people tend to overpay after being shown more expensive rings first. This is called anchoring. Social comparisons also affect spending. People often match the size or price of rings they see among friends or online.
Debt is another concern. Around 45 percent of couples used credit to buy rings, with 22 percent entering more than $5,000 in debt. Many financial planners advise setting ring budgets with a maximum of one or two months’ pay. They say this helps avoid serious impacts on savings and emergency funds.
Regional living costs add more variation. In San Francisco, putting $15,000 on a ring could use up nearly 20 percent of a down payment for a condo. In Cleveland, that amount might equal half a year’s worth of rent. Tools like the Estate Diamond Jewelry budget calculator now give location-based advice, suggesting lower ring budgets in more expensive cities.
Spending habits have changed, too. Today, 27 percent of couples buy the ring together. Some even split the cost evenly. In the past, one person usually handled the cost alone. Now, 22 percent use family stones or heirloom pieces, helping cut the budget by about $2,300 on average.
Buyers are also adopting new methods. Klarna and similar providers let people pay in smaller installments. Jewelry stores now offer consultations where clients can design rings without first disclosing their budget. These sessions help stop emotional overspending. For example, 29 percent of stores now use this method to keep clients focused on essentials.
The three-month salary rule may still appear in ads, but actual data shows most buyers treat it as optional. What matters more is finding a ring within reach, without putting long-term finances at risk.
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